Technology Can Make Your Relationship Shallow

In 1995, decades before she began participating in research on the subject, Rena Rudavsky and her family were selected to participate in a new psychology experiment: Carnegie Mellon University researchers set up computers in their classrooms to eat and connect it to the Internet. At that time, only 9% of Americans used the Internet (in 2020, almost 91% did).

Rena, who was a college student at the time, remembers sitting in front of the computer day and night, participating in Internet chat rooms and browsing the Internet. When he finished, another family member took him. Surprisingly, this experience did not spark much discussion in his home. “We talked a little in the dining room when the computer was on,” Rena told me in an email. Additionally, “none of us shared our personal online experiences with any family members.”

Read: Keep Away From the Top 10 Mistakes Made by Starting Technology

Rena’s experience is typical, as the researchers showed when they published the now famous ‘HomeNet’ study in 1998. “Your social workers,” the researchers wrote. To have anxiety, this “increasingly increasingly [computers]” are made. Rena said that his experience has deleted these results.

Homenet may be (and spent) as an internal event, analysis or modern discussion. In fact, it explains a much simpler truth about love and happiness: the technology that makes us interact with others will actually reduce our well-being, so it is important to our lives are carefully controlled. In order to take full advantage of them, we need to use digital tools to improve our relationships. The coronavirus pandemic has created an environment conducive to social research.

Whenever the situation of human relations changes suddenly, scholars like me quickly use our board in hand, asking boring questions. One of the most frequently asked questions of the last two years is how our sudden shift to digital communication – away from face to face – has affected global social connections. In an article in the journal New Media & Society, researchers surveyed nearly 3,000 adults during the first month of the disease and found that email, social media, online games and texting were not substitutes. perfect for human interaction. Voice and video calls are relatively good (although later research has questioned the usefulness of these technologies).

Social connection is the key to happiness. Reduce it and you will be worse, like your loved ones, especially your children. A 2014 study found that 62% of American children think their parents are too distracted to listen to them; the #1 reason is parental cell phone use. It’s clear how solitary pastimes like surfing or surfing reduce human connection: you’re doing them instead of socializing. But virtual communications like SMS are inherently interactive, so legal systems are less harmful.

The problem is that with these technologies, we lose parts. Text messages cannot send emotions effectively, because we cannot hear or see our interlocutors; the same goes for DM and social media. (More often than not, social media is not used to communicate but to broadcast information to an audience). These technologies are to human interaction what the black and white pixelated version of the Mona Lisa is to reality: recognizable, but unable to produce the same emotional impact. With low communication, we jump from person to person and trade depth for breadth. This is why face-to-face communication is often more extensive than text-based communication. Studies have shown that in-depth conversations are more beneficial than short communications. 카지노사이트

Meanwhile, in a recent longitudinal study, teenagers who texted more frequently than their peers were more likely to be depressed, more anxious , aggression, and poor relationships with their fathers. It may seem strange that even in the context of an epidemic, we willingly accept technologies that destroy our happiness. There are two main definitions: goodness and respect. Weeding in front of a screen (a ninth of American teenagers say they “pass the time”) is easier than talking to someone, and communication messages such as texts are faster and easier than visits or phone calls. Think of these technologies as a convenience store take out food: It’s not great, but it’s easy – and after eating enough microwave burritos, you forget the taste of the real thing.

As texting and social media become more widespread, many people feel that reaching out through old-fashioned communication will be difficult for others. I asked one of my older children when she was texting her friend why she didn’t dial 10 and talk to the guy. He replied: “That would be insulting. In 2019, researchers found that extended families often favor asynchronous communication such as texting to reduce intrusions at other times. This does not mean that behavior is universal; I call all my kids almost every day on FaceTime (and pretend they don’t see their anger).

Shutting down the internet and removing virtual media from your life is not the solution. This will block you and break the authority to get life. However, you will learn to use technology to complete, but to replace your relationship. Here are two ways to do it.

1. Choose a relationship instead of grass.
   No turning point in this command – I have told me to go out with my friends instead of watching television. The difference now, apart from the television that doesn’t fit in my pocket, is a clear proof: today, we know that, in excess, meditation only on the screen reduces happiness and can cause depression chaos .

To start your healthy habits, use a tool option that tells you how much time you spend on social media and the Internet, and limit yourself to one hour a day or less. Another popular method, which has not been tested in academic research, is to change your device from color to gray. My son did this and he swears it cut his mealtime down a lot. 2. Create a communication system. It’s unreasonable to expect someone to stop texting, but you can resort to it less if you have an “order of operations” in place to talk with your friends, colleagues, and loved ones.

Whenever possible, make an effort to meet in person, especially with your intimates. A 2021 study in the journal Computers in Human Behavior Reports found that the more face-to-face interactions people have with their partners, the more they feel understood. – and are satisfied with their relationship. When it’s not possible to meet, use face-to-face technology or the phone. Text or use similar technology only for non-personal or commercial purposes.

Rena’s experiences growing up as a child made her think critically about the effects of the Internet and have a lifelong impact on the use of technology. She had a Facebook account in college but deleted it after graduation and never got back. She avoids other social networks and her children are not online. By today’s standards, his life may seem primitive.

His daughter knocked on the neighbor’s door to come visit him. The family sits on the porch after dinner, chatting with each other and passers-by. He writes and sends letters. When he uses technology, it is in addition to, not replacing, his relationship: he keeps a parent’s text, for example, but only to establish an activity in a person.

For many of us, especially those who grew up on it, the Internet is an inescapable part of the environment of life, seeping into every crack and crevice despite every important decision and aspect us. We will not live before this kind of technology, of course. However, we can and should use it carefully in the service of love.